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Momma say if some one hits you /hit them back so the likely hood that you
hit and I wont strike is slim /but momma changed somewhere down the line/
and in between me learning lessons with time/ I met you/ and often I think
you/ I blink and my mental for a second dreams you /dark you/ sweet you/ yes
you/so you see I sometimes think you/ and long for us to one time take a
chance/ be as raw as we say we are/ test lines and limits that have been set
by the world/ but in our world we could make our own rules/ and suffer the
consequences of our systematic world once we return /lets escape together
and never return/ see im consistent and intelligent but in your case I often
opt not to learn/ nor remember that your attached to a branch of that world
that you willingly formed/ before you met me/ and sometimes I hurt with
thoughts of the way that world could make you forget me/ so lets escape
together/ and never return/ you see how yearning hearts don't learn /if we
stay in the sanctity of our world/ you would forever be warm/ I forever
inflamed/ us together passions storm/ some say the physical is temporary/
and I say on the contrary/ how could they who've never tried to be openly
free/  describe the possibility of what could become of we/ and karma kisses
me/ reminds me that she/ "don't skip a beat"/ the systems of that world are
strong the pain cuts deep/ and you and me/.maybe/ we arnt worth the risk/
but I love roulette.slim to none odds still leave hope so I keep hoping that
you will one day desire like I do stare karma down like I do and be willing
to reside in our world like I do.

Obsequious (a fool's broken record and revelation)
Dry lips long for your kiss like/ eyes water when you are missed/So I try harder to keep you happy when you are around// A glimpse of hope lingers...maybe this time you'll stay around//
This heart smiles when you come around/ but your never happy enough to stay around/ So I try harder to keep you content when you come around/
A glimpse of hope lingers…maybe this time you’ll stay around//So I try harder...//

ALL men want…/For you I would become//Your personal pleasure/ wet space to leave rage/ and I received you with open legs and a smile/ held onto the rage you left behind bottled it inside my walls/I took what I could get /needed to be all you needed/ needed you to see that I could… if only you would let me/ But you were never content enough to stay around//
Seasons change and no word…but you return/ with your arrival you brought//hope back to a fool//So I try harder/Because ALL men want…/

A lady/ hair, nails check/ nurturing, sensitive, sweet, everything nice, with a hint of needy/ just so you could feel needed/ because I needed to feel wanted// and you were what I wanted/what i thought i needed/For you I would be/A freak// Because all men want…The one that can make your toes do that thing and the hairs on your body stand in places that you didn’t know hair follicles existed/not afraid to taste you and simultaneously  hum a sweet tune/ give you those vibrations in low chords/ give you my blues…found another way to entice you so that you would return… needed you to see that I could be if only…//But you were never satisfied enough to stay around…//Possibilities exhausted as hope departs/ and Im left alone/ with an obsequious response to immature “women in need" thoughts/
But I digress and climb  higher inside self to reach a plateau of honesty //realizing that all the time I tried to obsequiously please you the benefactor could never have been me/
I was too busy conforming to standers that were never set and if they were when your mind changed you would forget
SO,,, I TRIED HARDER//
and the real me kept getting lost…lost…lost...

“On tenterhooks”

This feeling this uneasiness unstableness

Fear, the unknown like the first time I learned sex made me inferior

Unaware of who I should portray, who the world would except

Unknown to the blind eye I was uneasy

I crept upon tenterhooks

Confused, reluctant and helpless

To the treatment of lost kinfolks I witnessed

Rough words, hate crimes

Cold sweats and goose bumps

The day I learned skin meant I was unequal

Unacquainted with a need to render recompense

Unknown to another race I was uneasy

I existed on tenterhooks

In a position that compromised morals

Willingly succumbed to temptation

The overcast looks down the moon bares witness to my sin

Shame only comes when knowledge of wrong is present

How else could I say that I succumbed to temptation?

If I was not knowledgeable on the subject?

Moment’s Minute’s hours pass as I await judgment

“On Tenterhooks”